3/6/05

Today stayed home the whole day. First is to settle my time table, then settle the game, YS6 (finally completed it). Then continued the day with Grandia Extreme. I went jogging after that.

When I'm playing Utopia (online game), S msged me out for a drink. Now I'm going out haha, so this is a short entry hee.

Ah now I'm back from the drink. Its 1am now argh haha. S had a meeting just now so he came quite late. I went to the outdoor stage of Esplanade and saw this female group singing. Sounds very good. They are performing tomorrow and sunday too. Those who wants to catch them must go. They are selling this CD called The Gutsy Girls too. Look out for it.

After they ended their performance, then another group performed at another place near the stage. Its an all men group. "Its an Ochestra, Its Pop, Its stunts!" Is what they say. Theres one Violin, one electric guitar, one bass guitar and one drum set player. They are all on those strings that can make them "fly". So, they are all flipping and "flying" while they play those pieces. Its really amazing music because Classical are made in pop style. Its really a fun music.

When S came, we tried to enter Harry's but it was too crowded. Then we walked from esplanade to Suntec, trying to find a seven eleven, but it was closed for stock take, then we walked to the seven eleven at funan, and purchased some drinks. Then we walked from there to the supreme court, the to VCH, then back to Esplanade again, just because we wanted to find somewhere nice to settle down for the drink. Haha a super long walk.

Time to sleep.

Slice of Life

Fear of Rejection

The fear of rejection is more prevalent than some people would believe. In extreme cases, the anxiety is so great that the person simply retreats or crumbles into an uneasy mess. To these people, the seemingly common and simple task of interacting with a stranger can be nerve-racking. These people are often frustrated because they are capable of success but are defeated by their fear of rejection. They have no problems being great friends with one or two people but are unable to widen their circle because they can't seem to make new acquaintances comfortably. Their fear of rejection has thus "hermitized" their lives, leaving them mediocre and monotonous, with little or no desire to make things better.

So what can you do if you often face this kind of fear?

First of all, imagine the worst case scenario. Run it through in your mind. At this stage, forget about how you're going to handle rejection. Just think about the worst that could realistically happen. Our fears often take on a life of their own. However when you can stop for a moment and plan in advance, whatever does happen is usually not so bad after all.

Next, decide what rejection means. When we react emotionally to rejection we can usually come up with some awful reasons why people reject us, such as - "People dislike me", "I am a failure", "I am not worthy of their approval", "I am not good enough", and so on.

These limiting thoughts are only making things worse for you. And the thing is, only you can choose what rejection means for you. Other people can never make you feel as bad as you yourself can. So, if it's your feelings, your life, your choice, why not choose more empowering meanings? Such as - "The other person is probably feeling down, is insecure about something, or is preoccupied with a problem at the moment", or "I am the only person who's responsible for my own happiness, so I will not allow someone else to take charge". What about "How can I do better next time?" or "At the end of the day, I know that I am loved for who I am, by the people who do matter to me". Who knows, maybe you are the one making the other person nervous. Now wouldn't that be ironic?

Knowing what to say is not just a matter of what words to speak; that is only the tip of the iceberg. Ninety per cent of the solution depends on you taking charge of your emotional and mental states. The more you do this, that is, laugh at rejection in the face and continue to make your life better, the more comfortable you will be around people. Over time, you'll find that the barriers to your success and happiness weren't so overbearing after all.