21/11/04

Dear all. I feels so dreamy. Thats something I want to feel. Today I watched 4 disks of Winter Sonata. The feeling is getting more and more intense. How sad can things become? I think I have to carry on watching. I couldn't control myself but to let myself burst into tears. Wimp?

Just gonna tell everyone something about tears. Which part of our body controls our tearing function? It is the heart. I believe that no tears can be faked. You must really feel it before tear comes out. Whenever you see someone tear, please don't doubt.... its real. Since your heart wants to tear, why control? Just because society views it as not a good thing to tear? What a selfish society. Express your feelings. It is because of the society that we become so heartless. Ops generalisation and sterotyping. Sorry haha

Some phrases from the drama.

"At certain points in life, people will come to a split route. You will have to make a choice to take a certain route. This choice will affect your life, as well as others. Whatever route you take, just take it. Looking back can be painful."

"When you come to a faulty red light, do you cross the road? Or do you go to the next junction to cross the road? Going to the next junction might not be always a better route. The route infront of you might just be the one"

From all those things i see in the show, I believe it is always the best to follow the heart.

"If you are lost, find the North Star that can lead you. North Star will always stay in the same position even though the seasons have changed"

"When you are making a choice, you are not the one who is in pain. The people around you are also in pain. Be decisive, be firm. Being soft or kind will just cause pain to other people as well."

Somehow I feel that Winter Sonata is portaying itself as a deep sorrow, especially its songs. I could say that not one portray something happy. At least Summer Scent has kinda more of the Happy and Romance songs. But anyway, the songs in Winter Sonata are very effectively used.

My day out in Town

After watching Winter Sonata, something is telling my heart to find the piano scores of the songs. My heart says," I want to play those songs". Even though my piano skills are not good, I believe I have all the time to practice them. I have a life time. So I went out in search of the music scores.

I put on a different appearance today. Although I wore the clothes that I always wear, I had a different hair style. It really makes my whole mind different as well. Perhaps its the effect of the drama. I felt that I was dreaming. I don't want to come back to reality actually hee.

My first stop was Plaza Singapura (shopping mall). I took 143 and alighted at a bus stop before Meridian (I think its the name) and walked there. I went into the Yamaha shop. Its a very big shop, filled with books and instruments. I was like," how am i going to start searching?" I looked through almost every shelf. Nothing. The closest I found was the Scores for English pop songs. Oh my, where is it? The name Borders came into my mind.

I walked from Plaza Singapura backed to Borders. I was so lazy to cross the road to take a bus, so I walked back (Ironic? Laugh then). When i reached Borders, I went straight to the Music section. Look and look and look. Guess what?.... Not there. I got to think of another place. Compass point appeared in my mind.... but... its quite far. I am quite certain I can find it there but... I want to make sure I search Orchard thoroughly. I went to Takashimaya first.

Somewhere in my Memory (must be that show again), I remember having an image of me walking into a shop in Taka, where I can find the books. I walked around, and went into Kinokunia first. It is even bigger than Borders. I have to search for the map inside Kino. I was trying to find the Music section again. Turn here and turn there, but I can't find. Even with the map.... argh what is a man if that man cannot follow a map. In the end, I still found it. Thats not something to be proud of, because the number of books there is really amazing. Search search search.... I gave up.

I exit Kino... walked around in Taka.... wanted to give up and proceed on to Compass point. I saw the shops directory somewhere in the 4th level. That vague memory is still knocking me. I saw the shop names. "where where?" I saw this name.... Kawai. I am not sure if its that shop, but I wanna try. I finally came to a familiar place. Its the shop i see in my memory. I walked into the shop. I was the only Customer there. Kinda wierd feeling but I don't care. I walked to the books section and...... I FOUND IT.!! The book.... that book.... it has all the songs I wanted thats featured in Winter Sonata. My mind could finally rest. I paid for it, and walked out. Slight smiles on my face. I went home after that.

Hmm I'm amazed by my perserverence. But I got what I wanted. Can this kind of perserverance be applied elsewhere? I really don't know. I'll rather not be at some circumstances, even though the drama showed some. Doesn't work bah. Allow me to dream once more. :)