30/11/04

Breathe fire. Trying to get the kids organised to do all the necessary things on the stage is not an easy task. Especially that the criteria is very strick. Every movement must be very strict, fast and swift. All holding of instruments standardised when they move onto the stage. A few naughty kids would quarrel at times because their instruments knocked each other. Then, they started pointing fingers at each other. Worst than a bunch of aunties flocked together for arguments.

But, when you see the end product, you will be amazed that primary school students can put up such precision. Erm... however, we are still far from the top primary school bands in Singapore. I only taught for half a day (enough to vomit blood), and the other half, they went to the zoo but I didn't go. I deserved a good rest.

So after that, I went to meet on of my Euphonium disciple. She wanted to see my collection of band scores for euphonium. She is still the same. haha its always interesting to talk to her because she will give those kind of suanning replies, demanding requests (maybe not so much now), laughter that seems similar to mine. Don't know how to describe her much. But, I didn't put up a front (in other words natural) when i talk to her, so its really like a bro and sis thingy haha. For a sec 3(going to sec 4), she is one of the most hardworking euphist I have seen. One thing, She can really sew haha.

After all those laughing, she went to watch a concert and I went to a vcd shop before I went home. I saw this korean show- Stairway to Heaven. One of my ntu friend introduced me to that, so I was thinking that I can take this holiday to watch it too. Anyway I'm waiting for my another friend to lend me the Summer scent hee. I can watch both. Yeah!

Ahhhhh I discovered that I have a long strend of white hair when I was bathing. Oh no... I'm really getting old. Bad bad. Faint.

Tomorrow, I'll be in the Primary school for 12 hrs. They will put up their performance at night, and I'm suppose to help in the running of the show. I hope that everything runs smoothly tomorrow.

Slice of Life

"Addicted To Bad Relationships II

Many women remain in abusive relationships because they keep hoping that their partners will change for the better. They put their own emotional needs on hold, while they wait for their partners to stop abusing them, be it physically or mentally. They wait for their partners to kick their addiction - be it to drugs, alcohol, or gambling, though the passing days offer no sign of improvement.

It's easy, as an observer, to assume the woman foolish for choosing to remain with a bully. But you see, women don't intentionally fall in love with bullies. They fall in love with someone who's strong, in control, masculine, resourceful, and confident; someone who seems to "complete" them.

Abusive men can and often start out very charming and chivalrous. They tend to be fast-wooers, and on the surface, it can seem that that's because they're confident and decisive. However, a deeper examination of the man's psyche usually reveals a profound sense of insecurity and a fundamental dislike or distrust of women. They probably feel that prominent female figures in the past have let them down.

These men demand commitment yet hate the restrictions it places on them. They encourage their partner to depend on them, then become resentful of the dependency. This resentment, increasingly, reveals itself in reproaches, fault finding, withdrawal of intimacy and escalating outbursts of anger. In the early days, the woman is likely to reveal the extent of her distress. She may cry uncontrollably. She may threaten to hurt herself or run away. When she does so, the man's fury will subside and he will revert to being a loving partner… for a while at least.

Because whether or not he loves her, he desperately needs her. An abusive man restores his own feelings of self-worth by cutting the woman down to size. He needs her to shore up his feelings, so he must ultimately convince her to stay with him. This can go on for a long time, with each attack getting more and more severe, and the healing episodes fewer and further between. The woman soon loses the energy and will to leave. She stays in the abusive relationship, waiting for the "fix" that she mistakenly believes only he can provide. She thinks that her partner really does love her; it's just that he's having a hard time, it's stress, it's work, it's his ex-girlfriend, it's his childhood, it's his fear of losing her. That one day, things will be all right. But that day never comes.

If you think that you're caught in such a situation, do seek help immediately, before it destroys you."