31/5/05

I can't count the number of times I had listened to Guang Liang's songs in the new CD. I listened while I was doing my work from 10am to 3pm. I listened to it when I had reached Toa Payoh interchange at 5 plus. And I've only stopped when I had dinner, started when I finished dinner, and stopped when I reach home at 9pm. I repeat and repeat those songs. I can't stop loving them.

I've did write-ups for 4 articles for FYP. My group members will be discussing them on the Thursday meeting. I better get prepared. It took me abt 5 hrs. Considered very very fast.

Then I played game. YS 6 again. I think I can complete it by this weekend and return to my friend on Sat. It isn't good holding on to something for so long heee.

At 5pm, I know that I cannot stop myself from going out. I need to walk. I started the familiar journey to city hall, suntec, esplanade again. Its just the usual journey i would take when I just want to walk without thinking haha. This time, its special. I was accompanied by Guang Liang's music from the beginning to the end. It made me feel a sense of tranquility inside. Something I havent felt before for a long long time.

When I reached suntec, I saw hordes of business people walking around. I descretely observed their attire, and imagined myself in those suits. I just cannot believe that I would need to wear those someday. Its just so not like me. Talking about attire, I can't be bothered about attire. I wore a berm and a t-shirt matched with a pair of sandels out to walk today. How skimpish i know. Who cares haha. Ya btw, I didn't spray my hair anyway.

I could say that I walked suntec inside out today. I walked the same alley 3 times in total. To, Fro and Fro. How come I could walk 2 times Fro? Because I went underground after the first Fro.

When the shopping area starts to get a little bit more crowded, I decided to proceed to the ever-liked Esplanade. I rested my feet at a place outside Esplanade near the river where the outdoor stage is and started reading the novel that I had borrowed 2 weeks ago. The sky was still showing a navy blue shade as far as I could notice before I melted into the exciting scenes inside the book. I finished the book under a lollipop lamp. Lollipop you asked? Its a name I came up with a few days back when my friend said that the street lamp was so big. She said," go and hug and eat it." Of course I wasn't that crazy to do that.

The sky was dark when I looked up into the sky and I thought," hmm didn't notice it". I went to the place again. That place. And listened to Guang Liang. Its a different feeling. I couldn't notice the sour or pinch. My focused was totally on the beauty of the whole scenery. The dark hues that was matched with the glowing lights, creating a harmony for the night. The lights stretched itself into the river, as though white paint had been accidently poured onto a black paper. Beautiful scene i thought.

I didn't stayed there for long. Good things doesn't last right? I walked back to Esplanade to take bus 56 from the bus stop there. Surprisingly, I reached back home in 45mins. Great.

I'm satisfied with my achievement today. Work, Game, and Walking down memory lane, all in one day.

30/5/05

My body feel so exhausted today. Started my day with band teaching. I'm given a simple job of teaching students how to read notes and press their fingerings according to tempo. Thats fun job haha.....to me that is. Then I get to teach the percussionist to do warm ups. The warm ups are just so long haha.

Then I had lunch with my teacher. He told me so many things about practicing, air, and ensemble sound. Yeah. Somehow, I know that ensemble sound suits me more. My air capacity is just limited and my ear cannot endure loud sound.

Looks like nowadays, I haven't talk much about my inside feelings or even my thoughts about the things that are happening in the world. I guess I've occupied myself with things, thats why emptiness didn't kick in that much. Its true that if you leave yourself doing nothing, you're start thinking about funny things. So its adviceable to put the energy somewhere.

Ah, I just jogged in the evening, hahaa feeling feverish now. I guess I'm lacking water. I'll drink somemore now.

Slice of Life

Fast Forward, Rewind, Play!

So how do they do it? You know, the big-leaguers. People like Tiger Woods, and other achievers who seem to be able to consistently perform at their zenith?

They do it by sharpening their focus on the task at hand to a 100% Focus Perfection.

Right? so how exactly do you do this?

Well, psychologist Dr. Rich Starr recommends this simple trick?

Visualise that your mind is an audio cassette tape player.

If you are in the midst of an important task, such as hitting a golf ball, or doing a critical business task, and you feel yourself worrying about negative experiences you've had in the past, stop and use your now visualized cassette player and push the button "Fast Forward" and bring yourself forward to the present, and then push the button "Normal Play".

This gives you a nice visual sequence of rapidly leaving the past behind, where it should be, and zoom in to the task at hand. It feels like this - Fear, worry, apprehension in the past, clouding your mind, fast forward to the present, and Bang! - You've hit the winning shot!

Okay, so I can see the skeptics rolling their eyes. Of course you may not be champion the first time you try this. It requires practice and faith. But I do think that Dr. Starr's visual routine is a useful one.

He continues to say that if, on the other hand, you feel yourself worrying about negative possibilities in the future, again, stop and use your now visualized same cassette player, push the button "Rewind" and bring yourself back to the present and then push the button "Normal Play". Now you can easily think and act to handle the task at hand.

When you are in a continuing stressful situation, which often is the case, just keep doing the same button-pushing routine. Don't forget to take a nice relaxing deep breath each time you do the button-pushing. Cranking up as many stress-relieving smiles and laughters as you can also helps.

Dr Starr claims that this method works like a charm every time, so why not try it? There's no harm, and it might just be the key to unlocking your potential.

29/5/05

Started the day with game. YS6. Continued it. Then had lunch with mum in crystal jade. Its damn ex haha. Ate too much i suppose. Then went to band. Finally its full band combine practice. And suddenly my lips buzzed better than yesterday. I guess warming up is one most important thing to do before playing music.

I got so obsessed with Guang liang's songs hee. I'll be trying them in my next ktv session!! haha.

I guess nothing much today. I live a normal life during holidays. I still couldn't believe the results i got. Its just so dreamy. :)

28/5/05

Settled one short article in the morning for FYP, then played PS2 for 2 hours. Started on YS 6, cuz i need to return the game to my friend ASAP. Then after that, I went to watch a Percussion concert by this group called "struck". All girls grp woh.

Somehow, my ears are getting very picky. Not together here, out of tune there. Talking about out of tune, 2 bells sound are clashing because both are of different tuning. But then, consider that they have only started the grp 2 months ago and only had 10 practices, they are good. Sure have future development.

At night is Westwind. Sectionals. Haha, I miss the combine sessions already. individual practice is one thing, but does anyone know that combine practice is equally important? The togetherness, and harmony of sound. hard to get them you know?

Anyway nothing to say now.

27/5/05

TOday went to teach band in the morning to 3pm. I enjoyed the session today. Somehow, its in the mind to make the session enjoyable or not. All in the mind. I think its a fruitful session for the students today. Taught quite a bit of new things. Its really a satisfaction when you see the students understand the things.

After the teaching, I went back home to check my results for my previous semester. You know what?! Its my best results ever!!! I am so happy, happy until cannot close my mouth. Happy until I was celebrating with my pet dog. haha, And I bet she doesn't know what i was talking about. I thought I couldn't have done well, but then things really surprises me. I think heaven is really giving me a nice route. But then, heaven is fair too. You can't have the best of all worlds. There are some areas thats not very good on me. Haha. I accepted the fate already.

Then, I went to watch Saf concert with 2 of my friends. Its really an enjoyable concert. Their sound really changed. It was balance, sweet, not blaring. Not the usual central band that i know. I heard that the concert pressed the sound down. I really wonder when would it be the day when westwind would try that kind of sound haha. And make people understand that blaring isn't the way to "speak" in music.

Then, after the concert, one of my friends suggested to go to Harry's and so we went. Long time since i've been there. Hee I like it better when they play the cds rather than the person singing. haha.

Celebrate my good results with me!! Although still not the perfect results, but i'm contented.... really!

Slice of life

Seeking the Truth

Do you believe in the power of your convictions?
Well, it's time to lighten up!

People love attaching themselves to ideas. We can get pretty defensive when one of our beliefs is challenged. In fact, we probably spend more time defending our ideas than analysing our ideas. We claim that rules hem us in, but we still seem to be comforted by them. We like to hold on to our reasons for feeling righteous.

What gives you more satisfaction - being right or discovering the truth? Of course, the ideal situation is discovering that we were aware of the truth all along. We all like being validated. That's why we strive to win arguments rather than try to learn more about the other side or the other person.

A concept I often bring up is how life is a journey to be savoured. The destination is not the most important thing. It's the same thing with Truth, with Knowledge, with Ideas. Many people claim to have found the answers, then from there, they become complacent, bloated and self-indulgent. But what if what they found wasn't the Truth? Can Truth really be found? Or is it meant to be relative, nebulous and eternally inchoate? What if the whole point was to keep looking for the Truth?

Socrates was fond of saying that there are only two kinds of beings who don't need philosophy - the gods, who are already wise, and the fools, who think they are.

Human beings aren't meant to have it all figured out. It's not our nature. It's not our destiny. We are meant to be imperfect, incomplete. Our beauty is in our flaws, our weaknesses. Our Truth is our lack of wisdom and our lifelong quest for it.

Don't let anyone fool you into believing that there is a "right" way. Just because everybody else buys into it doesn't mean you have to. Just look at popular culture - entire industries fuelled by widely-held beliefs that make no sense. What about politics? Never accept an idea just because everybody else does. As Bertrand Russell, the British mathematician once said, "The fact that an opinion has been widely held is no evidence whatsoever that it is not utterly absurd; indeed, in view of the silliness of the majority of mankind, a widespread belief is more likely to be foolish than sensible."

Hang out with people who aren't afraid to admit that they don't have all the answers. Doubt those who claim to have found the Truth. Think for yourself and have fun with it! Approach truth-seeking like a five-year-old playing a new game. Don't get caught up in the regulations, and don't keep score. Who cares who's winning?

26/5/05

I had to travel to ntu to photocopy some articles for my friends. The bus ride was just so usual haha. Read quite a number of chapters of my novel. But slept on the second half of the ride. Sooo tiring.

I actually had to collect some articles from the door of my fyp tutor cuz he said he won't be around. But, when i returned the articles from under the door, he swung his door opened and greeted me into his room for a little chat. I was just surprised haha. He wanted to catch me before going to IRAs in the afternoon. Its really nice of him. He talked to me regarding the readings and answered any questions I had. A really caring and friendly tutor. Its just too bad that my other groupmates aren't around. 1 head (me) is still weaker than 3.

After that I went to watch movie in Cineleisure. I can't wait to watch the show, My Boyfriend is Type B. Its a korean show. haha somehow that show really brings Guys with bloodtype B to the ground. You know what? I'm type B too haha. Go find out what the show says about type B guys. But something is really funny, I can't remember what happens at the end of the show. I don't know why my memory is just missing in the ending part. If anyone watch it later on, can come here to tell me what the end is? Thankz ah.

After the show, I met up with my friend for Ktv!! Omg, I tried funny songs haha. Many songs that I never tried before, and I really like them. I'll revise my repertoire next time muhahaa. My voice range is getting greater, but then i'm still sounding quite thin at the top range, so need more practice.

SLice of Life

The Importance of Little Things

They say people who think small things don't matter haven't tried to sleep in a room with a mosquito.
Yes, indeed, it's not the size of the thing but the overall effect it has on the situation. The stained walls of a dentist's office might discourage you from seeing him again. An unkind word may sever a friendship. And the tiny missing piece of an ancient parchment may hold the key to the meaning of life.

It's the same at work. Bosses choose which people to give a great assignment to, take a chance on or consider for a project. Customers choose which businesses to frequent. All those little things really aren't so little. They're impressions. And those impressions help others make decisions about you.

Does it matter if you don't spell check your email? It's only an email, right? Wrong. It's an impression about the way you work. Does it matter if the address label is crooked on the letter you send a customer? Who looks at the envelope anyway? It matters. It's an impression highlighting that the company (or individual) has poor attention to detail.

Does it matter if you're habitually late for meetings or don't show up at all? It's an impression about what you think of other people's time. What about a voice mail message saying, "Your call is important to us. Please hold and we'll get back to you shortly."? When "shortly" stretches to five minutes, that little thing is an impression about the real importance of your call and the organisation's credibility.

And don't confuse little things with big things. You can't just do all the little things well and think that's it. Content is king on the internet and television; competence is king in the workplace. The competent performance of your job is central to any winning at working strategy. Second, this is not a message encouraging perfectionism. You can't be perfect. If you try to be, you potentially limit yourself and get lost in those little things. Third, some people have a talent for details and noticing little things. But everyone can learn.

Start by noticing those little things which create an impression on you. Little things like your name is misspelt on an invitation; or the staff readily and cheerfully gives you more chili sauce when you ask for it. What about when the delivery man arrives at the designated time? If you're not paying attention to the little things, you're losing opportunities or business. If you want to be winning at working, you have to pay attention to little things, too.

25/5/05

I settled 2 articles today! uh, terrible haha. I play games the whole day too. Kinda enjoyable.

Tomorrow I need to go to school to settle some things. My mind is just so empty now. The effect of playing too much games. Nothing to type.

Slice of Life

An Extra Marital Affair

An extra-marital affair can very often kill a marriage, but it doesn't always have to end in divorce. In fact, strange as it may sound, an extra-marital affair can sometimes help strengthen a marriage, by helping a couple identify what's ailing in their relationship.

I'm not here to argue the moral or religious aspects of it, but an extra-marital affair is undeniably a life-changing event. In the aftermath of discovery, emotions can spiral out of control. It would be fair to expect that the spouse who didn't have the affair would feel betrayed, inadequate, confused, and angry. However, after the dust has settled, it's vital for the couple to detach themselves from the negative feelings and ask themselves these questions:

Why did the extra-marital affair happen? Is the reason a pre-existing flaw in the marriage? Can both parties agree on the reason? Does the extra-marital affair warrant getting a divorce? Is the marriage worth saving? Are both parties willing to put this in the past and move on?

If you are currently trying to save your marriage and one of you had an extramarital affair, try to limit your pain that you feel and talk things out with your spouse so you can clearly define and agree upon exactly why the extramarital affair took place. If you cannot do this, chances are you will never get over the extramarital affair and your marriage most likely won't survive.

After you have defined and agreed upon the reason that the extramarital affair took place, you must decide whether that reason (or reasons) warrant actually going through a painful divorce. At this point you have two choices - either decide on your own or decide with your spouse. The latter is optimal for a variety of reasons but the main reason is that you may actually save your marriage if you decide together. Deciding together whether the real reason an extramarital affair took place indicates that you're both really reaching out for something, something you most likely didn't have, prior to the extramarital affair, which is togetherness.
So, should you get a divorce just because one of you had an extramarital affair?

No, not necessarily. Depending on how collaborative you can be with your spouse, how objective and fair you can be in assessing the pros and cons of the marriage, and how much soul searching you can do, you may just become stronger together because of an extra-marital affair. It may sound odd, but that's the truth. We all make mistakes. The essential thing is whether we can learn from our mistakes to become better people. Trust won't be easy to earn back after an extra-marital affair, but it will have so much more value for you and your spouse.

24/5/05

The whole day at school teaching band. Got damn angry with some kids because they disappeared after me giving them a 10 mins break. They came back like 20mins later. My face just turn so black. But I didn't scold them. I just kept quiet and look at them, for 5 mins. They keep on still joking, and laughing. I was trying the "silent killer" method to "scold" them. Save my voice you know? But then I kept on wanting to laugh too when they laughed. Cuz when kids laugh, you want to laugh with them. They just got this cheeky laughing voice hee.

Today, my teacher told me more and more about what he learnt from other conductors (friends) and also the speciality of those conductors. Its kinda interesting listening to him. And he also told me lots of things regarding the mindset of accepting new ideas. He said," absorb here and there and then combine to come out with different thinking that can be used at different occasion." hee its great idea.

How did that come about? Its because Mr Ong was telling me about playing a low note inside a trombone. He said," you don't need that much air to produce a low note. The resistence inside the instrument will provide you with a force that can combine the amount of air you are using to produce the low sound. Originally if you use that amt of air with the mouth piece, you can't produce a sound, but with the instrument, you can."

I couldn't accept that actually, cuz my buzzing doesn't depend alot on the resistence of the instrument. I can buzz low notes even without the mouthpiece. Its not that i'm good, its just that i use alot of energy. He is telling me that i can use lesser energy to produce a note haha. Thats quite useful.

Ah i go watch concert on tv now!! haha another day!

Slice of life

Expressing Your Expectations

Let's be honest - we all have our own expectations of our relationships, of our partners. Some of us demand less, but we all require certain events to happen and conditions to be met before we consider the relationship viable or worth maintaining.

Now this is not an unreasonable thing. We all have needs and it's our relationships that fulfill some of these needs - like the need for a supportive voice in tough times, the need for a hand to hold on a drafty early morning walk, the need for someone to kiss us even when we look like the back of a truck at the end of a grueling day.

The problem is some of us often don't make these needs known to our partner, and when he or she fails to meet these expectations, we begin to doubt the value of the relationship. It sounds silly but some of us expect our partners to already know. Now that's an unreasonable demand - to expect our partners to know our expectations. No matter how close two people get, no two human beings behave or think in the same way. Very often, your perceptions of what is good or bad in a relationship will differ radically from your partner's views.

So how are you managing your expectations in your relationship? Do you find that your partner's intentions often elude you? Do you question if he or she truly cares for you? Do you find yourself getting into regular arguments because your partner didn't do something you expected a partner would do? Like calling you at least once a day to ask how you are? Like remembering your birthday? Or like giving you a massage after you hinted that your shoulders are aching?

These expectations are reasonable and simple enough to you. But how would you partner know if you don't say anything? Expecting our partner to guess the response we're after is unfair. Loving you doesn't make someone magically psychic.

So express your expectations. Discuss them with your partner. But your expectations should not be unrealistic that nobody can consistently achieve them. Expectations that are too low can also invite a below-average result. And expectations should be positive. They should nurture the relationship. They should encourage the cultivation of joyful, loving and success-achieving qualities in both parties.

So the next time your partner seems to be reacting in a detached or unfeeling way, don't presume, don't jump to conclusions. Talk about your needs and ask him or her to let you know their desires as well.

23/5/05

I settled another article reading again in the morning. When I tried to read the second one, its just so dry that my mind cracked. Really gave up on it haha.

Went out to meet a friend to pass some things to each other. And then, we walked amk central. Found that that place haven't change much. Just find that place too familiar aha.

Somehow my health is really really bad. Eye sight getting blurer, ears getting weaker. Am I aging faster than other people? It is the same for my heart and mind, aging faster than ever. Can deny that I'm old haha.

Band teaching tomorrow again. Somehow, my passion really falls to a low low level. Its just that sometime i couldn't agree with my teacher about some teaching methods. Anyway, I still respect his way, and will still follow his way. Or perhaps it is me who is weak in my teaching. Sigh, sometimes its really discouraging when students just couldn't learn fast enough.

I like the novel I borrowed. Exciting and interesting enough. Mystery novel, what can you expect?? haha.

22/5/05

Yuppie, meet all my relatives today. We were all invited to my auntie's house because my little cousin 1st month celebration. I like buffet! Eat without thinking, but i ate very little. Stomach small, what to do?

I finally understand the stress of being single hahha. All the relatives will ask ask ask and ask. Whats wrong with being single? haha. My auntie even wanted to pass her baby equipments to me, saying it'll soon be my turn. What a joke haha. My mum was still joking with shot gun. OMG thats crazy. Never gonna happen haha.

I went jogging in the evening. I'm back to my routine life haha. Good. Play game and derive satisfaction from there. But when I think of work, something will just haunt me while i'm playing. This is the end of the 3rd week of holidays. 9 weeks to go, nothing much done for FYP. From the replies I got from my supervisor tutor, he seems to suggest," don't be so gan jiong, take it step by step." Haha, I'm more gan jiong than the tutor. OF COURSE I MUST BE. deeeeeeeeeee piak haha!

Some time in the near future, i'm going to turn my house into a kbox haha. Why waste money going to kbox if my house is capable of it. muhahhaa.

Lala

21/5/05

I finished a summary for one of the court case for tax. That took me about 4-5 hrs. Then I played games for 2 hrs and after that, went to my friend's house to get something hehee..

After that, went to band prac. Suppose to practice eupho but i think I practice my singing more. Today no combine because the conductor was away.

Before going for band, I actually had 1 plus hr free, so I went to West Mall walk walk. I also went to library to borrow a book. I confirm that I cannot read court cases on bus, so I borrowed a novel for bus reading.

boring day. I must keep reminding myself that my main theme for this holiday is Gaming. My passion for music has fallen quite a bit. I wonder when will it disappear. I think I might just stop music when I start work. An accountant won't have time for anything haha. Jia lad. I'm going to live alone... well, I accept it. :)

20/5/05

I'm posting early because i won't be online later. I need to write summaries for some articles.

I went to teach band early in the morning. I've been blurry this few teaching days haha. Lost touch on teaching. Its just so true that," Don't do something just because you can do it better than others, do it because you have the passion for it." I'm just a bit doubtful about my passion in teaching. Bad sign.

I manage to get another ticket for SAF band concert haha, consider me lucky. But now, I need to sell off my Tokyo Kosei ticket because my teacher can get me another one. He asked me to sell it away haha so I can save money. Thats a bit hard eh?

My teacher also asked me to buy tickets for a concert that he is selling. Can't reject, so i got 2 tickets.

To breakeven, I have to sell off my Tokyo Kosei ticket. If anyone wants, please just msg me here or hp if you have my number. Can't believe it, selling ticket for a jap band. haha

Slice of life

Spoilt for Choice

We live in an age of freedom and choice. 85 types of cookies, 30 varieties of canned soup, and 60 kinds of shampoo at the supermarket. More than 30 TV channels. Thousands of single Singaporeans who might just be the one with whom to share the rest of our lives. And of course, the Internet is a world of endless opportunities.

Some people would say that having more options is a good thing. But is it really? Does it improve the quality of our lives? Or are our lives becoming increasingly complex because of the overload of choices? What about discontentment? Are Singaporeans demanding more, appreciating less, and always seeking the best such that they think their present lot is never good enough?

In the book The Paradox of Choice (2004), Barry Schwartz says:

"Not all choice enhances freedom. Increased choice among goods and services may contribute little or nothing to the kind of freedom that counts. Indeed, it may impair freedom by taking time and energy we'd be better off devoting to other matters."

Freedom of choice is a good thing, but we are slowly discovering that it has a limit. There is a point at which it becomes a burden. Excessive choice can set you up to have expectations too high for satisfaction. Is this also happening in our relationships? Can no one live up to our expectations because we're looking for the elusive "ideal" mate?

As the number of choices keeps growing, there is an increase in stress, decision-making dilemmas, anxiety, fears, and disappointments. Schwartz suggests that:

1. We might be better off if we embrace certain voluntary constraints on our freedom of choice instead of rebelling against all constraints.

2. We might be better off seeking what is "good enough" instead of seeking out the best.

3. We might be better off if we lower our expectations about the results of decisions.

4. We would be better off if we paid less attention to what others were doing or what they were acquiring.

So think about your freedom of choice today. Is it making your life better? Or has it become a burden

19/5/05

People say, mosquitos like to bite people with Blood type B. Is it true? People say, Guys with Blood type B is very bad with relationships. Is that true? I want to watch that movie!! haha. Find out whats wrong with type B people, cuz.... I'm type B. Maybe I'm the one with the problem afterall.

Anyway, I went to school in search for all the articles for FYP. One whole stack again haha. Scary. I don't want to do work.... I want to play, I want to do jig saw puzzle, I want to read story books... so many things to do.... but... haha where is time?

The more I listen to FM93.3, the more I like it. The songs are nice, the DJs are cool, the programmes are meaningful, the jokes are funny. And... one of my friend is a DJ too haha.

Sometimes I really wonder if I can survive FYP. I always feel disheartened when I am face with great difficulties. Last semester was one of the worst time for me in life, and I simply slide through it without facing the problems head on. This time, the FYP will be another test for me. My groupmates.... we'll support one another right? I believe in them.

This is already week 3 of the holidays. I will take note of the weeks and the progress for the project. The milestone is inside my head. Adhere to it.

Oh yes, if anyone wants to just go out and slack and walk and do nothing, just find me. I just want to laz around hahaa.

18/5/05

I just can't stop loving singing haha, but I cough cough and cough. haha doesn't stop me.

Today, went for kbox with 2 friends at Cineleisure. I songs are ok but i just don't like the attitude of the waiter. Better don't say much or else kbox sue me haha. After singing, its just so hard to think of activities. Is Singapore a boring city? haha. In the end, we brought of of my friend to meet her other friends. We scared she might be feel bored with us.

After that, me and my friend went to Bugis. He said he wanted to buy CD. He bought 3! haha thats alot. Then we went to Bugis Junction. He bought a novel. Thats just power. I don't even think i would have time reading novel. I walked into a shop and saw lots of jigsaw puzzles. I wanted to do one, but i don't know if i have time! I would really like to have one hanging in my house.

After Bugis, we went to Bishan to collect my pants that was sent for alteration last week. As what I told my friend, shopping needs stamina haha. Need to train.

Slice of Life

Small Minds Discuss People

We all understand keenly the power of information. The battle can be won simply because one side intercepted news of the enemy's intention. A rash email can become a source of deep embarrassment, not to mention a potential source of blackmail. A person's reputation can be ruined by rumour.

Most of the time, our talk is a positive attribute. It helps us make friends and helps others feel included in a group. But sometimes, we get so caught up in talking and "doing what comes naturally" that we forget to think before we open our mouths.

There is an adage that goes "The kindest word in all the world is the unkind word, unsaid."

Here's something to think about the next time we feel the urge to talk about someone, or are in the presence of someone talking about someone else.

Do I know this to be the absolute truth? Am I adding embellishments of my own? How well-informed am I about this person or this situation? Am I qualified to make a judgement? Did I get this news from someone else? How reliable is that person? Is he or she consistently gossiping about others? Am I pointing out the flaws of others in order to distract people from my own? Would I want this news shared about me?

I know it's extremely difficult to hold our tongues - very often we think of it as "just making conversation". But think about what your words are doing. Are you muddying the person's reputation just for a bit of "conversation"? What are your words doing to you? What are they doing to other people's perception of you?
A quote attributed to former American First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt goes: "Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people."

The next time you're drawn into a conversation, watch what you say. What are you discussing? What impressions are you forming, intentionally or unintentionally? Are you preoccupied with the trivial pursuits, trials and defeats of other people instead of focusing on your own flaws and working on them to improve yourself? Are you a walking soap opera?

What we say about other people also says volumes about the kind of person we are. As someone once wrote: "The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouth of the fool gushes folly."

17/5/05

For the past few days, I couldn't sleep like I used to. I just don't know why dreams just go round and round in circle. Everytime, the same dream just hang at one place and I'll turn and flip to get rid of it off my mind. Then after a while, the same scene comes up. And, I'll flip and turn to get rid of it. And the cycle goes on and on. Its a terrible feeling. Something is wrong.

The weather is really tearing me apart. Hot and Cold. 1 week of flu and I'm still sneezing like hell. Anyone thinking of me? Sorry, I'm BHB. I just sneezed 5 times.

Its really a funny feeling when someone can't get out of your mind. Its not about expecting anything in return. Its just all about giving. I don't ask for anything. I guess its a kind of feeling no one can understand. haha, I'm actually quite dumb right? But, I'll rather not own something that doesn't belong to me. As long as that person is happy, nothing else matters right? (PS- all matters here are not for discussion in real life)

I love singing. I'm not a fantastic singer but its a really good feeling for someone like me to be able to express through music. I often make fun of my own voice too. Its all emotions within singing. Composing is another channel, but it takes more than feelings. It takes a spark that can ignite the flame.

Singing is a big channel of expression for me because I've never have a linguistic channel of expression. If I have a talent of expressing through poems, I'd really love to do it.

I'm just floating in the real world. haha

Slice of Life

Time is An Illusion

When we're feeling lousy or sad, we tend to forget that life does not go on forever. That every moment is an opportunity for love, knowledge, compassion, creation, and joy, and once gone, can never be retrieved. We are too fixated with the past and all its "could have"s and "should have"s, squander our precious present by feeling sorry for ourselves, and imagine a future that may not come to pass!

We've all been brought up to believe that time is quantity - 60 seconds make up one minute, 60 minutes make up an hour, 24 hours make up a day. But the meaning of time varies from person to person and from context to context.

Time is an illusion, a phantom, a delusion if you will. This moment is gone before I am finished saying "this moment". This 'moment' will virtually never exist! Time is not a thing, it has no substance...you can't touch it, you can't feel it, it cannot imprison you.

We should know not the quantity of our life, or our time spent on this earth - but we should value the quality of our life. Time by itself has no meaning - we have to give it meaning via our thoughts and actions.

There is so much happiness out there waiting for you. And there are plenty of people who can benefit from the joy you will bring them. You may now feel very lonely, and sad, and it may seem quite possible that you will never experience joy, love, spontaneity and fun again. Which is, of course, a most absurd thought. Don't worry, it's just the grief talking? the withdrawal, the initial disbelief and dejection.

It is never too late. Very often, when we lose something valuable to us, we think it's too late to salvage things, to express our love, to show our appreciation. What we fail to realise is that we have ample opportunities to do this with other people we love, and the ones we will come to love!

I urge you not to waste another moment of your life - you'll never get it back.

16/5/05

Went out the whole day. Chatting in Coffee bean, walking around cineleisure, sitting at Pastamania, went to ktv, then macdonalds. After so many days of stress with work, I really need a rest. I haven't been sleeping well the past few days, so i hope i can sleep well tonight. I don't want to be stress up with work.

Met new friends today. Kinda interesting bunch of people. Anyway, one of my friends is going to Germany for a few weeks of lessons and fun. Bon voyage.

I'm just tired haha.

Slice of Life

Happiness Through Love

What is the thing you want the most? The thing that everybody wants the most?

To be happy!

No matter what other prizes you may have thought of - money, sex, your own apartment, to be Singapore Idol etc., they all share the same reason for your desire in them - they bring you joy. Some bring more lasting joy than others, but the bottomline is that life is the endless pursuit of happiness.

But what brings us the best kind of joy? The kind of happiness that enables us to relieve stress, transcend illness, act selflessly, hop on clouds and scale mountains?

Lester Levenson, creator of The Sedona Method, claims he discovered the key to happiness. He searched for 47 years and nearly died in the process but he found it. He spotted a common pattern, one that was present in every happy moment - whenever he was feeling love towards another person he felt happy. And whenever he felt any other feeling he was not happy.

Well, don't simply take his words for it; test it yourself! Think of a time when you were blissfully happy. Did you feel loving at that time? This kind of joy is even more powerful than the feeling of being loved. It is the kind of joy that gives you purpose, meaning, and banishes all doubt and fear from your mind - the conviction that there is someone or some people you can give happiness to, care for, fight for, and die for. Anyone who's ever truly loved someone would know. That's why they say that "one never questions the meaning of life when he's in love".

Spend some time asking yourself: Who do I love most in my life? Who can benefit from my love, my time, my energy, my abilities?

And I'm not just talking about your romantic partners or family members here. What about the less fortunate in society? How can you help their lives be a bit better? Acknowledging your capacity for love also makes you feel good about yourself because your value as a human being is clear.

What can you do today to bring joy to this person, to these people? How can you lessen the stress in their lives? What can you do that will put a smile on his or her face, or that delightful glint in their eyes when you tell them you love them?

15/5/05

Band, Bad music, bad sound, bad pieces, bad. Can't be bothered anymore haha. Disgrace on the international stage.

I just feel so worried about work. I don't know why. When I play game, the work haunts me. When I'm reading the law cases, my mind weakens easily. I should ask my friends to read more. Hmm.

Wierd body again. Feels so tired and lousy. I better sleep early tonight. I need the radio to sooth my mind.

"Unstable mind. Unstable system. help?"

14/5/05

I completed another game. Dual Hearts, done. I wanted to start on YS 6 but then the disk didn't work. I'll look for my friend next week for his disk haha. Anyway, I started on Grandia extreme. Hope to complete it before next sat. Thats an Aim!

I also read a law article for 3 hours. Completed it as well. I wonder whats my groupmates doing. I hope I'm not the only one chionging for FYP. I've been reading alot of things these few days. I just have this bad feeling that they are depending on me too much. I don't like this feeling. I hope they'll contribute more.

Today band day. Not combine, sectional. Sectional for non concert pieces. In the end, its a Trombone, Eupho and Tuba "Quartet". About 7 people playing the Quartet scores. Not a bad day I think.

Then rain .. rain rain rain. Suits me. I don't know why I got bad feeling when I walk in the rain. Lightning and Thunder gives me fright. Sigh, how to protect people like that?

My flu is nearly gone. I think I could play next week. Looking forward for Monday's outing, then Wednesday's outing, then Tuesday and Friday teach band, then Thurs go back to school to search for reading materials.

Can someone hear what my heart is trying to say? Cuz I can't hear it. And I don't understand it. Is it pain? Is it fear? Is it confusion? Is it Sadness? Don't know.

13/5/05

After one day of hardwork yesterday, today seemed like a day of holiday. I didn't do much work today. Played games for 5 hours, hoping to complete Dual Hearts soon so that I can start on a new one. Then I went to City Hall to meet my FYP groupmate for some legal case readings. Haha, I just feel like a lawyer haha.

My friend and I went to Crepres & Cream for a little meal. I saw this item on the menu..."Choco craze--- highly sinful" So i ordered it. Nah, its so disappointing, not sinful at all. haha. I'll have more next week.

After that, I went to Bishan to do some shopping. Real shopping. I spent so much money on a pants, a polo T, and a T-shirt. I'm going to retain my own character. Not going to change myself much. As long as I'm comfortable with myself, who cares if other people sees me as a nerd or one who doesn't know how to dress up.

Tomorrow is band day again i'm just so bored with it. Don't know if i should stay after this concert. I'll weigh cost and benefits.

12/5/05

So.... what did i do during the holidays? People complaining nothing to do. I'm here, reading a 700 pages Law textbook. But luckily, only 150 pages are effectively readable. So, I completed them and wrote a 12 page summary for my other 2 group mates for FYP.

There was this one hr during the reading where my mind became a robot. Eyes straighten, fingers typed with little movement. My parents are fine now, but I'm not. There are some damage that cannot be cured. Its a permanent damage.

My medicine has run out but my flu and cough is still there. I know myself. I need more time than normal people to recover from even a simple flu. haha, what to do?

Slice of Life

Living a More Focused Life

You've heard it a thousand times. Life is short. Make the most of it. The saying has become so hackneyed that most people these days don't even give it any serious thought. But in order to find lasting fulfilment in our lives, we need to understand that our time here is precious. Every second of it.

Yet, how focused are we on people and activities that improve the quality of our lives and give them drive and meaning? How much time we waste on "zoning out" - wasting hours, even days on so-called "soft addictions", like eating, reading, watching TV, surfing the Net, shopping, chatting on the phone, and so on.

What's so bad about these things, you ask? Well, the activities themselves can be harmless, and indeed, most of the time, they are. But when we think about how much time and energy we invest in them, and how much we really get back, then we begin to realise that these mildly pleasurable pursuits can compromise the quality of our lives.

Don't get me wrong. We all have to eat. Reading can be informative and educational, and so can TV and the Internet. But we have to spend more time doing these things with focus and intention. Snacking is fine. And there's nothing wrong with reading a comic book or watching a reality TV series. These can be relaxing or simply entertaining. But we have to balance these with foods and media that benefit our bodies and minds. Spending hours chatting aimlessly on the phone, mindlessly watching TV, or indulging in unhealthy foods on a regular basis rob you of the time and energy you could've spent on investing in your relationships, your health, your mind, and your soul.

It's fairly easy to determine if your activity is, or is becoming a crutch for you. For instance, television can be a window into new worlds, stimulating viewers with new ideas and leading them into meaningful pursuits -- or it can be a means of escape. But as you engage in this activity, think about why you do it and what it does for you. When you watch a television programme, are you actively involved in the process? Are you absorbing information? Are new ideas triggered? Are you inspired? Or do you finish a bag of chips, channel surfing, and simply letting whatever's on to wash over you? You may believe that this is a way for you to relieve the stress of work. But surely there are better ways of doing that. After a while, activities which are performed
mindlessly and without focus numb your mind, encouraging you more and more frequently to simply escape from life. On the other hand, if you are intentionally involved in the activity, it can enhance the quality of your life.

11/5/05

Feeling alot better. Just that my breathing system hasn't fully recover. I'm still in the drowsy state. Still taking medicine.

Even though the world is floating, I forced myself to read some law documents. OMG, the words are floating too. Can't believe it. Even when payments are made to onerous contracts, we have to consider if its a revenue or capital expenditure. OMG. FYP.... Law.... haha. COME SUE ME!

I have forgotten how to smile. Throughout these few days, my parents seems to be behaving rather odd. I could feel it when something is wrong. 3-4 days of coldness, then 1 day of happiness, and suddenly coldness till now. I really don't know what to say about them. But I bet they didn't know that such coldness is affecting me. Its affecting my deepest control system of emotions. From young till now, had been like that. It was worst when me and my parents shared 1 room when i was young. All those screaming and throwing of stuffs. I could only hid under my blanket and weep quietly.

Who has caused me to have such an emotional heart? Perhaps to say, a weak heart? Why do I hate girls with loud voices? Its the fear inside.

I would like to beg all my friends not to tell me anything regarding relationships. I have lost faith.

I have seen so many girls' respond to "why they don't want to get married". And mostly said," Because I don't want to be binded." Those kind are career type women. Who wants those kind of women anyway.

And to all women out there. PLease don't think that only girls get disgusted by guys. Guys can get disgusted by girls too. Who in the world set the rule that girl can scold guys while guys have to be gentlemen and let girls scold?

Why are good guys hard to find now? Because they have seen through the world and all went into hiding. Slowly, think of the changes from ancient time till now. What has changed and what hasn't change. Figure out yourself.

And to the Society: Please don't see Bachelors as wierd aliens. They should be given equal rights for everything.

P.S All thoughts here are only for discussion online, not for real life talking. Nothing regarding this subject matter should be discussed out of this virtual world.

Slice of Life

The Power of Asking Questions

You've probably heard the joke about how men can never ask for directions while driving. You know, how they will drive round in circles, hopelessly lost, yet are maddeningly confident about where they're going - "Don't worry dear, I know it's just after the next turn". How they will sooner eat their foot than admit they're lost and consult a passer-by?

Well, I don't know how true this is - only a woman passenger can know. But I do know that in being afraid of asking questions, one loses out on the opportunity to learn something, to improve oneself, to make things better.

Asking questions is an essential way we all learn - after all, a Chinese proverb goes "He who asks is a fool for a minute. He who doesn't ask is a fool forever". But the power of asking questions goes beyond simply asking other people questions. Asking ourselves the right questions can also have a dramatic impact on our self improvement, success and happiness.

There are times when we find ourselves in difficult or uncomfortable situations, or even in a position where we feel completely overwhelmed. It can be very easy to say 'what have I done to deserve this?' or 'why does this always happen to me?'

However, these questions are destructive and only serve to prepare us for future disappointments. In fact, they can actually guarantee it! The questions we ask ourselves reflect our state of mind, reinforce our beliefs and have a huge impact on our results.

We all experience events that seem too overwhelming to deal with, and there is a great deal of valuable information available to help in these situations. But in almost any situation, no matter how bad it may seem, there is usually something positive that can be found.

Actually asking the question 'what can I learn from this situation?' is a great starting point, even if you only learn what not to do in the future. But you can go much further. It has often been said that when one door closes another opens; and that in every setback lies opportunity. Don't just stare at the closed door - why not try asking yourself what opportunities are now available, or what doors have just opened for you? It will improve your state of mind and may just change your life.

10/5/05

Last night, just when i thought i was a goner, I heard the vibration sound of my handphone. Someone sent me a msg. Just a bit surprised with the msg. And come to think of it, my battle with the fever seemed to have ended at 2am.

Even though I'm having a bad flu, I had to go to school for a meeting with our FYP tutor. It was truly a heartening sight when we found out that he is indeed a kind and friendly professor. He is patient as well. He recommended us to look into one of the topic he is doing, and also one of the topics that we have suggested. I'm quite interested in the one he suggested. Come to think of it, my life is quite affiliated with legal stuffs haha. Gotta read alot of things on Law.

I guess I only have energy to type until here.

Slice of Life

Designing a Life You Need

Do you have pre-requisites you set up for yourself, things that have to happen first before you'll be happy? For many of us, it's a way of life. We live always in expectation of that next big thing that's going to make it all complete. The diploma. The marriage. That new big job.

Remember that first paycheck in your first "real" job? It seemed like so much money! How long did it take before that same check, newly strained by the rent on the bigger apartment, that car payment, or your new lifestyle, all of a sudden didn't look so big? If you're like most of us, not long, and suddenly, you found yourself thinking, when I make more money, then things will be really great.

It's really easy to get caught up in not having enough when you focus on externals. Someone once said "You can never get enough of what you don't really need."

It's the perfect explanation for people who must always have the latest gadget, or just another pair of shoes, or the biggest house. Why can that need never be satisfied? If your life is focused on fulfilling these so-called "needs", then you'll never be really happy.

The next time you think you "need" something, think about why you need it. And think about how you will feel when you get it. How long does the pleasure last? For example, the latest gadget that has everything in it, 80% of which you will probably never use more than once. What else can you do with the money that will bring you more satisfaction? More joy that lasts? Nurturing a relationship perhaps? Buying gifts for your loved ones?

You must understand what drives you to be liberated from it and to start to design your life to fit your needs. Learning to identify your true wants and desires will make you much more effective in achieving your goals and in setting up a life that works for you.

9/5/05

A day full of sleep. I woke up at 9am plus to see a doctor. I dragged myself and waited an hr for the doctor. My head was so painful that I kept holding my head with my hands. It was a torturing experience. Its like running 2.4km while sitting down. After I went back home, I ate porridge and Medicine and woke up at 5pm. I still feel like sleeping, so I won't come online later. I need to sleep.

Tomorrow, I still need to go to school for a meeting with our tutor for the FYP. I'm just so dead already. I feel so cold. Been wearing sweater throughout the whole day. How I wish I have 100 blankets on top of me.

I just to sleep. Sorry, my groupmates, I can't read any articles for preparation of tomorrow's meeting.

Slice of Life

Having Serious Fun

In our society, fun has become a scarce and underrated commodity. Sure, we talk about having fun at work, making learning fun, and having fun with our kids but how many of us really deliver? Has it simply become a catchy buzzword that people pepper their speeches with but very few have been able to successfully instill in their work and personal lives?

To many of us, the value of fun is still not convincing enough. It seems too facetious, too frivolous to be having (excuse the oxymoron) serious fun. We love our quotas, profit margins, grades, and progress reports too much. At the office, at home, and at school, do we really feel we can do less and achieve more? One look at the numbers we have to make sends our "fun-o-meter" plunging.

We have to seriously re-evaluate our assessment criteria such that at the office and at school, we can truly and boldly take learning, creativity, and productivity to a new level of fun. These are steps that we can only hope the people-in-charge can make, but what about your personal life? Are there things that you can do to make your life more fun? I knew someone once who told me in a world-weary voice that he didn't laugh anymore.

He remembered a time when he would have lots of fun with his friends, but time and circumstance broke them up and since then, he's been so stressed at work that he's been unable to have fun. He misses laughter so much, yet has no idea how to get it back.

I think we all are in danger of getting into that kind of situation. So many of us spend so much time and energy making a living or ensuring that our quotas and deadlines are met that we hardly have the time to just take a deep breath and clear our mind. I'm sure you can start planning fun activities of your own once you realize just how important it is, but here are some ways you might begin.

Find a theme-based festival such as a comedy festival, food festival, tourism festival, or jazz festival. These events provide hours of excitement for the entire family. The cultural fods, music, and activities at festivals make them well worth the time spent. What about hiking, camping, and fishing? They make great outdoors getaways. Take a break and experience nature in an adventurous way. Include lots of outdoors activities on your fun calendar.

A life without fun or with very little of it will experience burnout. Make fun your priority and the rest will follow. You will find yourself better able to do the other things on your calendar, leading to a more productive, more creative, happier and healthier you!

8/5/05

Today is mother's day and I have to be sick today. Darn. Its just a flu, so not going to hit me down. People say I have high determination. Today I showed it.

I went for band. 4 hours of playing with half lungs. Can't even breathe properly. Cough as usual. That person continues to try to irritate me, but i was so blur and tired that i can't even be bothered. I am adopting the strategy of ignoring people who wants to irritate me. Its a form of psychological work here.

After the band, I dragged myself back to Toa Payoh, but I didn't go home straight away. I tested my determination to a greater heights. I went to the library to search for the book," Sun Tze Art of war for Executives" Its returned!! but i cannot find. No fate.

Then I went to a shop to buy something for my mum. Its a soap that is shaped as a ROse. The petals can be peeled off and used as a soap. Her favourite colour is blue, so its a blue rose. Eeks when have I become like that haha. Then after that I went to Sakae to buy sushi for her. She likes them hee.

Then I managed to survive back and now typing this and having a meeting. Terrible haha. I feel like I'm drunk. Luckily I like this kind of feeling, or else I'll be lying on the bed crying headache haha.

7/5/05

Today i ate 3 Rottiboy bun. I'm crazy over it now. Taste so good, so crunchy, so coffee haha.

I completed devil may cry 2 Disc 1. Can't be bothered with disk 2. Quite boring.

Band. Someone just have to use words to poke me from behind. The words from that mouth, even though not directed to me specifically, are just so linked to me. Can't stand it. That person is so many years older than me but just behaves like a child. If that person wants to play softer, he can just go ahead and play soft and stop giving unnecessary comments that has zero musical sense at all. "oh I must baaaaalance with the other people" "I'm opening my eeeeears to listen across to other people".

I just wonder when can Singapore band members understand about the group concept in music playing, and also the real meaning of musical expression placed on scores. Group concept.... Any section is only as strong as the weakest link. Even though you might be a great player, but other people are not, then performing at an unnecessarily high level just makes you sticking out. When Forte is written on the score, does it mean loud for the whole band or loud for that individual player? If you are a musician, think.

Musical expressions... It is no longer the loud, soft, forced attacker, marcato, sfz. It should be in terms of intensity, mood, flavour, texture, and feel. When performing a crescendo, it does not mean playing loud, it may represent an intense feeling, anger, a slight push, etc. Also, when one plays loud, the tone colour should be taken note. Does that crescendo need a broader sound, or does it need a piercing sound. Some people just don't think and keep on piercing and piercing and piercing.

Actually, I have nothing against that person, just that he could opening complain about our section, then of course i couldn't sit there and stay quiet. I don't joke in Westwind. When I go there, I'm in for a serious stuff. Anyone who tries to try their luck on me, gets it back heavy and tough. Even though that person might have so many Diploma for performance, failing to have a humble heart, group concept, musical sense, on going desire for improvement, learning from others including those he might thought to be lousier, is a sin. How many certificate holders are not performing to their standard. How wasteful.

I for one, have just a stupid grade 5 theory from ABRSM. I have never failed to want to learn. Even from my teacher, who i always thought that his conducting needs improvement, I've always learn something from him. I don't shun his ideas away immediately. And true, I learnt.

Today is another day that I minus points from my perception of Westwinds. I can't stand being in a place where people keeps aiming at me. Thats why I awalys say i cannot survive in a corporate world. If things carry on like this, I'm saying goodbye to Westwinds. I cannot concentrate on music if someone keeps poking me with words. Either he shuts up or I leave, period.

6/5/05

I started my day by finishing 4 vcds of a hongkong drama. Tomorrow i'll start another series.

After that, my friend A and I went to Toa Payoh swimming pool for a swim. After 10 mins, guess what..... Cloud burst into storm. It was one of the heaviest rain I've ever experience outside. Wind howling, thunder roared. My friend and I hid in the changing room haha. Can't wait for the rain to stop, so we changed back and ran in the rain towards central. Had a nice lunch after that. My friend treated me a bun from Rottiboy!! I was so paiseh again. But the bun is fantastic!! I've never tasted a bun so full of taste. One is really not enough. Highly recommended.

Even though Devil may cry 2 is a sucky game to me, but i still continued it when i got home. Just finish it and count it as a game completed hee. This holidays is for me to complete as many games as possible. Chiongster is here.

Was facing the taxation thingy again. Hard hard. Need to meet to discuss. Sigh.

Slice of Life

Healing Through Acceptance

When misfortune occurs, many people try to deny or resist it. They go through the exhausting and pointless cycle of thoughts that goes something like "No, no, this can't be happening!" or "Why is this happening to me?", usually meaning "Why is this happening to poor ol' harmless me?".

As a result, they go through long periods of emotional suffering that can be damaging to their psychological or physical health. They waste a lot of energy and time rejecting what's happening to them instead of healing themselves by accepting their situation.

Now by accepting the situation, I don't mean going through life thinking everything that happens to you is ok. What I mean is, although it's completely natural to react with disbelief and resistance when something seemingly bad happens, you can only being to mend when you accept your plight and move on.

Some things happen to us that are completely out of our hands. You might call these "acts of God" if you're the religious type, or genuine accidents that you have no control over, like natural disasters or a reckless driver in your lane.

But we have to accept responsibility for most of the things that happen to us in life. Being in a developed country in the 21st century means that most of us have all our basic needs covered - food, shelter, education, healthcare, sanitation, and so on. Which leaves us with things like our emotional needs, our value systems, our desires and ambitions, and our behaviour.

These stem from our attitudes towards and perceptions of ourselves, others, our surroundings, and the wider world. And we have the power to tweak these attitudes and perceptions to influence our mental well-being and potential for love, joy and success.

So when something seemingly "bad" happens to us, the fastest and most direct route to recovery is acknowledging and accepting it - "Yes, it happened. And yes, I may have had a role to play in creating it. What can I learn from this? How can I improve things? How can I improve myself? How can I move on?"

5/5/05

Today is 050505. A special day? Seems like a code of life haha. Anyway, I woke up too early haha, just for games. Crazy gamer here. I completed Zone of Enders 2, with a total game play time of 5 hours. Then, I started devil may cry 2 (kinda sucky game haha, don't suit me), and also started Duel hearts (platformer RPG game).

The rain in the afternoon was just so awful. The sky was totally dark.

I started on my research for my FYP. Sucky? haha. Yup, its holiday and i'm doing this kind of work. Can't get any good ideas for the topics. Still searching for one good topic. I want to do well!! And want to do the best!

Anyone for a drink this sat? haha. Soccer at 11.05pm!! I bet harry's would be crowded!!

I need to get my shopping engine starting. I need to shop!!

4/5/05

I feel so tired now. I think i've worked too hard the past few days for exercising. Just a little feverish. Hope I'll be fine tomorrow. I need to get started on some research for the FYP topic or it'll be too late. But... I still want to play.... sigh.

Today, my friend and I went to the creative's customer care centre. The place is just soooo small and soooo run down. People say that the customers are the most important but that place is just so lousy. Not enough seats, messy counter, long waiting time, spoilt fans, empty water tanks. The waiting there was so torturing. But, they replaced my spoilt item without any reason asked. Thats one big plus point.

I started reading that jap book and learned quite a bit today hee. Its just so fun.

I need to rest ahhhhhh.

Slice of Life

Cheering Yourself Up

Cheering Yourself Up (Part 2)

In this edition, we continue to explore how you can cheer yourself up when you're feeling down. Force yourself to smile and laugh. Smiling tricks your mind into thinking you're happy. Probable result? A more light-hearted you. And laughing instantly makes you feel a whole lot better because you take in lots of oxygen and that revitalises your blood cells.

(?) So share a funny anecdote with a family member, friend or colleague. Laugh heartily! Make something. The process of creation takes your mind off your worries, and you get a sense of satisfaction when the product finally emerges. Write a poem, paint a picture, make a mural in your bedroom, or plant a garden. Keep a list of things you can appreciate; things that you normally take for granted. A loving family, good health, the sight of verdant trees in the park, friendly colleagues, peace, or a satisfying meal.

If you try to identify the blessings in your life, you'll find the list endless. Start a project. Redecorate your room, learn a language, polish your car, take music lessons, go for a film appreciation course, anything! But it's crucial that you stick with your project till the end. People don't fail. They give up. So follow it through and your self-esteem will receive a much-needed boost.

Go through your address book and meet up with your old friends. It's so easy to get caught up with work and family and neglect the people with whom you have an intellectual or emotional connection. Connect with them again. Go for a movie together and analyse its many layers. Invite your friend over, ask him to bring his favourite CDs for the moment, listen to music and talk. Share a pizza and catch up. And finally, simply choose to be happy. There are plenty of things to be sad or sorry about in life, but you know, there are many things to rejoice about as well. Perhaps a shift in focus is all you need.

3//5/05

I think my day had been fruitful. I finally completed Tales of destiny 2. The story is just superb. The twist and turns in the story line was enhanced with the emotional aspects of the characters. They seemed alive and so real. With a total voice over the characters, the emotions was nicely brought out. Nice. Total game time, 44 hours. A standard RPG time haha.

After the game, I went to swim again. This time, I challenged myself and completed 2km swim without stopping. I took about 60mins in total, which average out to 1.5mins to reach the other end of the pool. A slow snail haha but kind of achievement.

After swimming, I went to the library to check on the books I want. The sun tze tactics of war hasn't been returned yet, so I could only search for a japanese book to learn the language, but the one i was looking for wasn't there, so I took a substitute. Shouldn't be that bad hee.

Someday ago, i heard this statement," Do not get into a relationship just because you think that you need to depend on that person to be happy. You should be happy in the first place before the relationship." I forgotten the reason, but its true isn't it? haha.

I'm reading the second chapter of the book "change your life in 5 days". Learnt quite a bit, and mostly just enforces what I've learnt before. EQ is just something not alot of people has and I sometimes do lack of it too. So many Qs you need to be successful in life haha. IQ, EQ, AQ, SQ, FQ, which stands for, Intelligence, Emotional, Adversity, Spiritual, Financial quotient. Its a short book, so if anyone wants to borrow, just give me a msg.

Slice of life

Cheering Yourself Up

When you're feeling down, it's great to have a partner or a friend who will try almost anything to make you smile. But most of the time, the only person we can count on is ourselves. So here are some ways you can cheer yourself up!

One of the simplest ways to pick yourself up when you're down is to dance! Make a compilation of mood-elevating songs that you can put on whenever you feel blue. Gives the term "elevator music" a whole new meaning, don't you think?

Or, spend time with children. When the world becomes too complicated to handle, kids so effortlessly help us to make things seem so much simpler. I remember visiting a friend recently. I didn't get enough sleep the night before and was actually quite grouchy when I arrived. But after a few minutes of trying to converse with my friend's two-year-old son, I was right as rain. Words didn't matter. He giggled, I babbled like a complete idiot, he jumped up and down, and I made silly faces. It was a blast.

Another great way to take your mind off your troubles is to indulge yourself. Forget about cost or responsibility for a while, and just do what you love. Buy a new car! Did I just say "buy a new car"? Ok? but only if you're filthy rich. Buy the special edition DVD of one of your favourite films and watch it plus all the bonus features at one sitting. Go for a massage. Have a dark and rich chocolate cake. Buy your own cue and go shoot some pool.

I don't know about you, but clearing clutter alleviates stress for me. I know some people actually find comfort in disorder but if you're not like that, take a day off to go through your stuff and get rid of what you don't need. Emphasise space and delete waste. Physical baggage can be just as frustrating as emotional baggage.

Identify the things you've been procrastinating about and take action. Few things are more liberating than checking off your "To Do" list. Just ask The Bride in the movie "Kill Bill". Just kidding.

And speaking about kidding, have more fun! At work, at home, anywhere! Lighten up! Don't care what others think of you. Be corny, flippant, and outrageous. Get out of your shell and have a party!

In the next part of "A Slice of Life", we'll continue to explore how we can cheer ourselves up when we're feeling down.

2/5/05

If my day carries on my like this, i'll have nothing to type here haha. Whole day game. Going to complete Tales of Destiny 2 soon. Should be able to by tomorrow. I started that game like 1 year ago haha. Taking too long. After completing then can start another game.

Anyone got a chocolate craze? Feel like going for a little chocolate feast. Ops sinful sinful haha.

Days of lying around and do nothing,
Means that I need to find something.
When all around me seems busy,
My mind will start to go fuzzy.
3 months of this life, but I'll fill it with things.
No worries no worries. Just walk and see.

1/5/05

A normal day, nothing much. Started on a book called, Change your life in 5 days. Not that I want to change my life. I just want to know more about the contents inside. Might help me in the future.

Cinema ticket price adjustment again? Sian. Just watch them on Monday, tuesday and wednesday. Hmm better business for VCDs and Dvds.

Esplanade has fireworks at night but... Didn't go. No point bah.

30/4/05

A bad music day. I totally cannot derive any satisfaction during the band session. Totally pissed off by the new band room. Acoustic was damn bad. But the good thing is that they know that the place is bad and they are going to install carpet and curtains. Totally disgusted anyway. The Whole band sounded like a loud amplifier, worst damn normal time. I hate loud sound, I hate people shouting. Brrrrr

But the fun thing today is that I went to my buddy house for a gaming session. Lots of game exchanges hee. And Me and Him completed Gradius 5 today. Good and exciting session hee.

Haha the moment i stepped into my buddy's room, he asked me why I look like Uncle. Well, I just took my hair cut this morning and I purposely want this kind of ugly look to keep my mind away from some stuffs. Then I can stop thinking about some stuffs, because I know I'll start thinking when I have free time. Its still better to put my mind on other stuffs. Hmm I really look like uncle? haha

Tired and I don't want to think about the band session today. It sux.